Mind / Matter

Happy Valentine's Day! (I was writing this the day before and with the intent of publishing on Valentine's Day).

I'm sure it is not being published on February 14th, but hopefully I'm in the ball park!

I've just been a little bit blown away with my willpower in the past almost-six-weeks, so I wanted to write about that today, especially with all the chocolate and candy and love in the air. Perfect timing, Kate.

Before this year, I would use holidays of any kind as an excuse to "cheat" and eat poorly, whether for a day, two days, or maybe just one meal. I would say, "I'm doing to devour these cheese fries and this bread basket and this sixteen ounce steak because it's Valentine's Day, and I deserve a treat." You could swap out Valentine's Day with my birthday, Christmas, Thanksgiving, July Fourth, you name it. Holidays and "special days" were days when calories didn't count and healthy eating didn't matter. Maybe I would begin the day really determined, but at some point I completely disregarded my goals (and my stomach), said "to hell with it," and ate what I wanted.
This usually resulted in me being miserably full--of food and regret. Too much cake. Too much turkey. Too much chocolate. Too much, too much, too much.

All too often, these were the times when I would completely give up on my healthy regimen, with the mindset that I'd already screwed it up-I might as well quit and try again later.

Just like that night at my friend's house, during out "late night" girls' gab session (I wrote a little about it here), I knew I wasn't hungry, and on top of that, I knew I didn't need pizza. If I had been hungry, she had bananas on her kitchen counter, fresh fruit in the fridge; there were better options.
But I knew that cheesy, pepperoni pizza wasn't going to get me any closer to my goals at 1AM on a Saturday morning. Would it have tasted good? Hell yeah. But I wouldn't have felt any better about myself thirty minutes later.

In a nutshell, that's the mindset I've had this year when I get around my favorite foods or situations where the possibility of overeating is definitely there: Sure, this would taste good, but is it going to help me? Is it good for my body? Is it going to get me closer to my fitness or health goals? 

If the answers to any of those questions are NO, I stay away. Sometimes it's easy. Sometimes it's a firm, "No, thank you." And sometimes it means getting the hell away.

I'm constantly taking progress pictures before or after I work out or in the morning because in moments where turning down food and treats are really tough, I can see that I've made an incredible amount of progress, and I shudder at the thought of throwing it all away. I'm not at all saying that one helping of French fries or one chocolate brownie with ice cream is going to ruin six weeks of work, but I know myself and I know how easily my willpower could slip away if that little demon in the back of my mind has her way.

I will enjoy a plate of fries and a brownie soon; I just know I'm not ready for it yet.

I hope your Valentine's Day, no matter who you are, was wonderful. If you treated yourself in any way, I hope you enjoyed it! I hope if you're reading this and realizing that we share similar struggles, I can be a source of inspiration and hope for you. It often takes a little while to see big progress, but if you keep going, I promise it's coming!

I feel happier and stronger each and every day and all because I finally got my mind in the right place, ready to make big changes and be the healthiest I can be.

Thank you so much for being such amazing readers and for supporting me; I can't believe I've had this blog nearly four years now! I'm so thankful to have friends like y'all cheering me on! Love you guys!

My Answers to Five of Your Questions

1. What's your Starbucks order?
Two options.
One: tall iced coffee, sweetened, with half and half.
Two: tall latte, extra hot, made with whole milk, add whip on top.

2. What's your go-to workout in thirty minutes or less?
HIIT for sure (High Intensity Interval Training). This is the best way to get your heart rate pumping and body sweating and burning calories fast. I do this by walking, jogging, then sprinting in intervals on the treadmill, utilizing the incline as well, or by using my own body weight for squats, lunges, and pushups, then throwing in some high knees, mountain climbers, and jumping jacks!

3. Where do you get your recipes/snack ideas?
PINTEREST all day! But I definitely tweak almost all of them to my liking. I try to eat low carb, so that  means lots of lean meat and veggies and cheeeeeese, y'all! I love that I can have almost as much cheese as I desire--almost! As far as snacking, I'm a sucker for anything salty with a crunch, so it's sometimes difficult to get my snack fix when I'm really craving chips! I'm crazy about Triscuits (6 crackers = about 21 grams of carbs) and a Laughing Cow Swiss cheese wedge or 2 cups of SmartPop (7g carbs). And of course I love some peanut butter with carrot or celery sticks or apple slices!

4. How do you balance a healthy lifestyle with family life/motherhood?
I have two very understanding, loving, supportive men in my life in Vaught and Eric. Eric understands my need to be fit and healthy for our family, while Vaught reaps all the benefits of having a mama who can keep up with him and keep her sanity because I'm putting in the time and effort to take care of myself as well as him. I understand that every mother's circumstances differ, but even if I were still working full time, I would take strides to have those 3 hours a week to myself at the gym. I would still treat myself to a bubble bath once a week, a mani/pedi once a month or so... That was important to me even before we started a family and is important to me now. I do have my days when I just want to stay under the covers. I have days when I feel like I'm not doing a good job, but those days are rare and they usually pass rather quickly! I never thought I would look or feel this healthy as a mom at twenty-six!

5. Who is your favorite Disney princess?
It was once Cinderella; I liked that she wore a blue ballgown instead of pink. Then it was Belle because of her love for books. Now that I think about it, Mulan isn't my favorite princess, but she's such a badass; she chopped off her hair and taped her boobs so she could fight for her dad in the Japanese army. The one Disney princess I can't seem to ever let go of, though, is Pocahontas. I always thought she was the most diverse and most beautiful. Plus, she's pretty bad ass too! I watched that movie over and over as a little girl!

Give Your Body Time

Weight loss is hard. It is by far the hardest thing, the most difficult struggle in my life as of this time (and has been for the past 15 years of however long it's been since I became conscious of my body). It's harder than motherhood and childbirth (yes, I said that and I stand by it). It's harder than marriage and relationships.

Losing weight is a relationship in itself in that it's something you have to work at every single day. You screw up sometimes, you make decisions that ultimately make your body hate you (or vice versa) for a little while. It has its highs and lows, and when it's going well, it's going really well, and when it sucks, it effing sucks. 

"Weight" and "weight loss" and "my body" are a few, among many, words and phrases that are difficult for me to say and talk about simply from sheer embarrassment I sometimes feel when I realize that I'm twenty-six years old and am still working at this. I have friends and family who read here, former colleagues, classmates, former students, and maybe even a few people who just really do not care for me, and for the past 4 years that is mainly what you have come here to read: I am still working at this, still struggling, still fighting the same fight, though somewhat wiser about it now than I once was. 

I looked and felt my best about a year after having Vaught, but I've since lost that girl, not just physically but mentally and emotionally as well. I wouldn't know her if I saw her, and she certainly wouldn't recognize me. 

Fitness took a back seat in my life while I busied myself with other things, knowing the entire time I was letting myself go, if only just a little and if only for just a little while.

I have no idea how much weight I gained in the fall of 2016, but it wasn't pretty. My guess is right at 15 pounds, but it could have been a little more or maybe a little less (doubtful on the latter). I knew what I was doing to myself, but I was in this temporary mindset where I seriously did not care. 

And then I woke up the first morning of 2017, an empty wine bottle and cardboard pizza box left on the kitchen counter as proof of who I had let myself become and I decided, for good - no seriously - for good, that I did not want to be that girl anymore.  

It's so cliche to say you're gonna revamp your entire life starting with the first day of the new year, but think about it: could there be a better time? My goal is not to get skinny, for the good Lord blessed me with hips and a big booty that I actually really like and want to hang onto (lolz). My goal, instead, is to become the healthiest version of myself this year. I'm weighing, but the number doesn't control my life. I'm letting my body decide where it's comfortable each day, but I'm having to be patient in the process and truly listen to what it's telling me.

Maybe you're like me and you've finally had enough and are ready to get serious about your health, or perhaps you're brand new to fitness and are just looking for a good starting point. Here's what I can tell you-- these are the tips that work for me.

1. Give your body time.

 

I didn't wake up on January first of this year and immediately cut out all refined carbs and junk food. Cold turkey is only good on whole wheat bread; give it time. I remember taking my time to eat that day. I'd been eating junk all winter, so that's what my body was used to, but I fixed a green salad for lunch and still had some chips as a snack later then had some lean protein and veggies for dinner. I had a good workout that afternoon. The next day I made homemade tomato soup and instead of a full grilled cheese, ate an open-faced grilled cheese on some whole wheat toast instead. I worked out a upped my water intake. By the tenth day of January, I had cut carbs and sugar in my diet by about 70%  and was making smarter, healthier choices daily.

Do you see where I'm going?

One reason it was always incredibly difficult for me to stick to new diet regimens was because I tried to completely revamp my eating habits in one day. This may not be true for everyone, but for me, this was basically me setting myself up for failure. My body would go into withdrawal mode and I would go crazy wanting sugar and carbs and all the things it was used to.

Give. Your. Body. Time. It will get used to subtle changes each day and making healthy choices, coupled with losing weight, will happen easily and naturally.

2. Make friends with the scale.

So, the scale in my bathroom broke sometime in late November (PEFECT TIMING, right?!) I went about two months without weighing myself, which can be a bad and good thing. When I started getting healthy this year, I didn't immediately go out and purchase a new scale; I honestly was not ready to see the number because I knew if I weighed myself on the tenth day of January, I would be disappointed; I knew I weighed more than I expected. Finally, on January 19th, when I could definitely since some good changes within myself, I went to Target and purchased a new scale. I weighed the next morning and was so glad I'd decided to wait; I weighed only a couple pounds more than the number I was guessing.

Some people can weigh every day and the number not affect them, as it's normal for it to fluctuate a pound or two from day to day, but I decided that I would limit myself to weighing twice a week, no more. I've stuck to that regimen and am glad it's something I'm comfortable doing. So far, the numbers have only gone up once, and that was the morning after the Garth Brooks concert (I drank two margaritas with dinner the night before and there they were)!

3. Expect temptation and eat it for breakfast.

I knew temptation would come and I knew it would be really hard to ward it off if I wasn't prepared for it, so before going out to eat, dining out with friends, doing drinks, whatever was going on in my life, I gave myself a pep talk. Crazy, right? But it works! One of the very first trials was a night out in Oxford for my friend's going-away party in mid-January. I had a reasonable dinner and only a couple of drinks on the Square that I couldn't even finish because my body was so turned off to alcohol. After getting a cab back to her house, they ordered two pizzas for us to munch on for "late night." Guys, I literally sat cross-legged on the couch with a large pepperoni pizza in my lap as my friends ate slice after slice (they are, by my definition, perfect so they can do things like this). My mouth was watering at the smell, but I knew I wasn't hungry; my stomach was still not happy with the two cocktails I'd tried to make myself enjoy earlier. At one point I literally had to walk out of the room and get away from the smell because #pizzaislife.

It's hard, y'all. And see, if I had been truly hungry I could have eaten a small slice or at least half of one, but I knew that I wasn't, and though my brain was saying YASSSS, girl, my stomach and heart said Seriously, plz don't.

I woke up the next morning feeling so freaking proud; I knew that if I could turn down late night pizza, I could do literally anything.
 

 

4. Keep temptation around.
Sounds counteractive, right? It's totally not. I try to limit the cookies, crackers, and other refined carbs in my pantry, but they're there, nevertheless, and I totally don't mind them. I figured if I could withstand having them in my own house where I could binge eat and devour in private, perhaps I would be a hundred times more disciplined outside my home--going out to eat or to a party or wedding reception. It was really really hard in the beginning, just as it was to sit at my friend's house that night with a pepperoni pizza in my lap. But each day it gets easier, I swear. Each time I say no to a cookie for myself when I give Vaught a treat, I realize that by saying no, I've done something healthy for myself. Would one cookie hurt? No. Not at all. But it also won't bring me any closer to my fitness goals, so #boom.

 

5. Just keep going.
Even when you have a bad day and a gallon chocolate milkshake and jumbo French fries was the only solution, get up the next morning and jump back on it. Eat the brownie and go work out. Eat healthily so you can enjoy a slice of birthday cake at your niece's birthday party. Exercise a few times a week so you'll feel good and live a little longer. Health and happiness looks good on you! Do it for you, friend.

 

 

Remember me?

I feel as if I'm writing these "sorry it's been so long!" posts way too often, and it's embarrassing to my character as a writer and blogger... at the same time, life happens, right?

2014 and 2015 were my big years for blogging. This site was updated multiple times each week, and I was constantly dabbling in self-development as a blogger and website developer. I was proud of what I was doing; I knew I was good at it!

Then I spent most of 2016 building my home-based business and succeeding with that; again, it's something I'm proud of, and I recognize now that I'm far more skilled at networking and building relationships with people than I ever was at teaching.

As I write this, I'm sitting in a conference room in Guyton Hall at Ole Miss, waiting on class to start; I am one class away from having a master's degree in English education, and once this is complete, who knows what happens? I'm honestly open to anything.

But I also love my blog. Really. Really. Really love it. I spent hours upon hours building this fan base (lol) and readership only to neglect it for most of 2016, aside from the occasional post here and there. Coming back to it and reigniting that passion for my writing is an enormous goal for me this year. I feel like 2017 is going to be amazing, and I want to use my blog to keep my friends, family, and readers from all over updated on me, my family, my business, and everything that's going on in my life.

I feel like I always stayed so motivated and committed to my health and fitness journey when I was constantly updating you all on my site, so I'll definitely be getting some fitness updates to you really soon! It's been a great year so far, concerning my body and lifestyle and the changes I'm making, and I can't wait to share that with y'all.

I was so excited about losing 20 pounds already in 2017!!

I can't wait to jump back in and get some good posts up for y'all. I just had to come back and post an update so you know I'm still here and am not going anywhere anytime soon :)

I love you all so much! Check back in in a few days!

Kate

S I X Makeup Tips from the Girl Who's Been There

Many of you have been there. Standing in the middle of Sephora or Ulta with not a clue in hell where to even start. You pick up a tube of shiny brown stuff you think is mascara; turns out, that stuff is for your brows. Chapstick is your lipstick of choice. And the only thing you wing is life--forget eyeliner.

Well, I've learned a few things about makeup in the past fifteen years I've been wearing it. I've also learned a little about my skin and how to care for it. I've learned that you don't need pricey cleansers and exfoliants. You don't have to go to cosmetology school to learn how to apply good makeup. And speaking of good makeup, you don't have to spend a fortune for quality products because more often than not, those "quality products" are simply drugstore formulas with better packaging.

Below are the best tried and true makeup tips I have to offer.

1. Yes, do powder. Foundation will wipe your face of some of its natural color, regardless of how on-point your skin/foundation shade is. A loose powder swiped on evenly over your foundation simply brings some of that color back to your face. (Be sure to match your foundation and powder shade to the skin on your neck)!

2. You can do bold lips. A bold lip with a soft eye. A strong bedroom eye with a soft lip. It's about keeping things balanced and even. And yes, you need lip-liner (not more than one shade darker than your lipstick, girlfriend).

3. Brows matter, but they don't need a powerful gel slicked over them, giving the brows a "painted on" look. It's not natural, it's not cute. Try a powder no more than one shade darker than your natural brow color and use a small, angled defining brush to push the powder into the outer line of your brows. No need to fill in the entire brow unless you're going for a heavier look, which is okay for GNO. Keep it simple for your day look!

4. Contour with powder, not cream. Some girls swear by a cream contour kit, but I find it sticky and messy by the end of the day. Contouring with powder is so much easier to do and stays on much better. Use a bronzing powder and contour brush to push the powder from the center of your ear through mid-cheek, just below your blush.

5. Stop putting mascara on your bottom lashes, ya filthy. I haven't worn mascara on my bottom lashes in probably two years. It looks dirty and is the prime culprit of that raccoon-ish, melted mess underneath your eyes by two in the afternoon. Also, avoid using liquid liner on the bottom lashline for the same reason. Instead, use a small, rounded brush to dot a eye shadow along your bottom lash line. I almost also use a gold color here; it makes my blue eyes POP.

                                                             

6. WASH YOUR FACE. I'm still working on this one. It's so easy to go to bed with a dirty face, but your skin will thank you for it if you make cleansing your skin each night a routine! I also use our Exfoliating Peel by ItWorks two to three times a week to remove dead skin from my face. This stuff has done wonders for oil control too!

My Best Advice Regarding the M-Word

I know my mother's gonna see this pop up on her timeline sometime this morning and laugh her ass off.

Did I not just give you money to get your laptop fixed three months ago?

Yes, Mother, you did :)

Hi, I'm Kate. I'm a recovering overspender and shopaholic. I gladly and proudly admit that I am rising from the ashes of an overspender's cremation. It's funny to imagine this, but four years ago right now, my and my husband's finances were better than they've ever been. Things didn't begin to slip until I lost my job and had our son shortly after just two years ago. Since then, I've been building back up, pretty much from the ground (or perhaps the pits of financial hell). I would say we hit pretty close to the bottom in the summer of 2015, but things were much better when I returned to work full time as a teacher that fall.

As you guys know, my venture back into teaching, what I'll always consider my fourth year, didn't last very long, but thankfully, I began my adventure with ItWorks shortly before quitting my job in the classroom. You want to talk about the Lord's blessings? ItWorks immediately was there to pick up the slack from quitting my job so that we didn't get even further behind.

In complete honesty, it's been uphill from there. It's not always easy, nor is it fun, but I am most at ease with my finances when Vaught's dad and I sit down, write them out, and decide where and how we can improve.

If I could go back to being eighteen years old, here's the best budgeting advice I would give college freshman me.

1. Stay away from credit cards. Credit card debt is not sexy, and it's hard to get out of. If you absolutely must, get one card with a low interest rate and low limit ($500-$1,000). Charge a tank of gas or a snack to it once a month so your card stays active (perhaps pay a small bill too if it's helpful at a certain time of the month). The second your credit card bill comes in, pay it off. Completely, if you can. If you can't afford to pay it in full for whatever reason, aim to pay at least double the minimum. I know it sounds horrifying, but don't just pay the minimum.

2. If you must have credit cards, keep the balance on them at 30% of the card limit or below. I'm serious. If the card limit is $1,000, aim to keep the balance at $300 or less (refer back to number 1). But if at all possible, don't rack up a bunch of credit cards.

3. Keep a checkbook and keep it balanced. No one taught me how to do this until my  mother sat me down and did it herself towards the end of my senior year of high school (that's how she found out about the tattoo on my left ass cheek, too. "Why is there a $75 debit at Oxford Ink??" Awkward).
I cannot stress the importance of writing down your bank account balance and keeping up with every transaction processed through it, even something as small as $2 spent at the convenience store. It will save you a lot of trouble and senseless anxiety to always know what's in your bank account!

4. Start saving and start small. It's completely understandable if thinking about starting a savings accounts overwhelms you or freaks you out; it did me too. It took me years to finally open an account strictly for savings. That's why when I did, I started small. I used an old coffee tin to put loose change and dollar bills in. After a couple months, I had more than $50, and I knew it was time to open a savings account! I called around to find one with a great interest rate (make money while you save money, right??) It took about twenty minutes to open my account and the rest is history... Sort of.

5. Designate a percentage of your paycheck to put in savings and put that percentage in there every single pay period! My personal preference is at least 5%. If I make $2,000 a month, for example, at least $100 is going into my savings account. That money is there for me to use in case of emergency (things happen), or to dip out of if unexpected expenses comes up (again, things happen).

6. Pay your bills on time. Not only is this good for your credit, it's good for your conscious. There have been times where paying every single bill on time didn't leave us with much left over to make it to the next paycheck. Although it sucked sometimes, it was always worth it to know we were in the clear. There have also been bills that I've pushed to the backburner to make room for the extras... That sucked even more. Don't do it. Bill comes in mail, pay it. Immediately.

7. If you need help, ask for it. I don't mean asking your parents to spot you because you blew all your  money on GNO (I don't know that from experience or anything), but if a monthly expense is becoming unmanageable, see if there's a way it can be lowered or even eliminated. My DirecTV bill became far too high for me to pay every month a couple years ago. Lowering it was as easy as getting online and chatting with a representative who helped me take $25 off of it without eliminating any of the channels we love. When our Verizon bill was upwards of $500/month, we made the decision to switch to Sprint and saved $300/month (seriously). If you must ask to borrow money from family for any reason, do it respectfully and make a plan as to how you will pay it back.

8. Do not make any big, financially-binding decisions until you're ready. Whether buying a home or a car, don't do it until you're 100% certain you can foot the bill each month. I never dreamed that when I bought my house, I'd be jobless less than two years later. I'd also added two vehicles to my name during that time, which put even more pressure on me and quickly began to affect my credit. Think these big decisions through and learn as much about the process as you can.

9. Eliminate small, unnecessary expenses. Starbucks every morning. McDonald's everyday at lunch hour. You may only be spending a few dollars at a time, but making your coffee and meals at home and taking them with you will save you hundreds of dollars every year. I used to go to Starbucks every single day until I did the math on how much I spend at this over-priced (but freaking amazing) coffee chain and realized I could be putting an extra $100-$150 in my savings account without it. Now, Starbucks is a once or twice-weekly treat. Okay, three times if I'm feeling crazy.

10. Get some goals and make them happen. Another reason I absolutely could not remain in education? There's little to no money to be made, and you can say what you want, but it's the truth. I hated the idea of my salary being only a handful of dollars higher each year, so I opted for something else. Let me just add to this that money isn't everything and I value time with family and friends and making memories over any dollar amount, but I do want to know that I have funds there if and when I need them. I want to travel some day, and you need money to do that. I want to have money to put down on a new home when the time comes. I want to buy my mom a new vehicle and maybe some farm equipment for my dad, silly as that may sound. I love giving to charities and my church, and I never want to not be able to do those things.

Maybe I don't have it all together, but I'm well on my way and have learned so much about my finances in my "adulting" experience so far. My hope is that maybe you've learned something here you can apply to your own situation too!

I'm not gonna be that mom...

I made the decision when I got pregnant, and possibly even before, that I wouldn't be "that mom."

 

You know, the one who's obsessed with literally every trend, every fad, every reason to go non-GMO, all-natural, obsessively organic with my child. I've done well, for the most part, though I did go through an organic phase, and even now I catch myself grimacing a little as I watch my mom or someone else feed Vaught macaroni and cheese or a second cookie. But in general, I'm pretty chill.

One thing that is so prominent today, especially with the literal explosion of social media in my generation, is mommy wars. Mommy wars and mom-shaming is real, and I hate it. I absolutely hate it. But it's there and my assumption is that it's not going anywhere any time soon.

It's gotten so bad that I used to be afraid of posting pictures of my two-year-old son in the car (throwing cheerios and apple slices everywhere) because he's forward-facing, and I have several friends (good friends) on social media who are members of the carseat police. I didn't dare announce to the world that Vaught was 100% formula-fed by the time he was two weeks old. And don't even get me started on the death concoction that is sunscreen. (Seriously, read that article; it's everything I can't say).

But today, I'm breaking the silence, at least just a little. I swore I wouldn't be that mom, and I'm not going to be.

You know... That mom who...

... freaks out over gender-specific toys.
Y'all, this is a rising fad. Either you're making sure that your little girl plays with only dolls and only wears pink or she's in overalls and is playing in the dirt with tractors because you don't want her feeling confined to gender-specific colors/toys. That entire sentence just gave me a headache. I don't have time to deal with it. Vaught wears "boy clothes" but I definitely wouldn't freak out if he ever wanted a pink t-shirt. He plays with typical "boy toys," but he also loves his stuffed animals something serious and calls them his "babies." He even has a pink teddy bear (I have no idea where it came from and I don't care) that he is obsessed with. He takes a new baby to bed with him every night. Y'all, I cannot deal. I do not have time for this gender nonsense.

... is a bona fide member of the car seat police.
Please stop. I get it, you want every child to be buckled in properly and safely secure (I do too!) but please stop mom-shaming other moms for when they switch to front-facing and other things of that nature. It's such a catch 22 because you're thinking, I ONLY DO IT OUT OF LOVE, but so often it comes across as judgmental and mean. I get it, I really do. But it's just one of those things I can't be bothered with. No one has ever made a comment about Vaught's front facing seat (he's the average height and size of a four-year-old as it is), but I'd sure as hell tell someone to stick it if they ever did.

... is obsessed with breast feeding.
Notice how I say obsessed because there is a difference in being a breastfeeding mom and being an obsessive, mom-shaming milk machine. Breast feeding isn't just something we do for our babies nowadays; it's literally become this explosive culture, this divide between those who DO and those who DON'T. And those of us who don't, especially those of us who chose to be a part of the don't? We are the outties, the crazies, the moms who don't give a shit about the well-being and health of our children. We are selfish and lazy and weak. Just stop. I tried, and I hated it. I only breastfed Vaught for two weeks and will probably not breastfeed my second child, should I ever reproduce again. You won't catch me feeling bad about it. And my boobs still look incredible, so there's that.

... offers unsolicited advice.
I can't and I won't. I feel that my job as a mom and as a member of the elite society of motherhood is to support and encourage my mom friends. My friend Cameron had her baby girl about six months ago, and we were chatting about the transition from bassinet to crib a few days ago. Despite making Vaught a crib sleeper from the time he was two weeks old, I was so encouraging and supportive towards Cameron, who genuinely asked for my advice regarding the process. I just feel like it's best to show love and support to other moms.

I just have this insane need to reach out to every mom I know and even ones I don't and just tell her she's a ROCKSTAR and that her kid is beautiful and loves her so much! I want to tell her that whether or not she co-sleeps or formula feeds doesn't determine who her child becomes or demerit her as a mother in any way. I want to thank those moms who exclusively breastfeed and assure them that their is no shame in the nipple game around me! I want to hug those mamas of sick children and assure them that they are wrapped in the comfort of God. 

Parenting, and more specifically, mothering, can be hard, but at the end of the day, it matters only that your little ones are healthy and loved. Keep it up, mama. I see you and appreciate you, girlfriend.