I faced a really tough situation recently and though it hurt--my God, it hurt-- I didn't sink. I rose above. I swam.
When I was younger, it was so incredibly easy for something (or someone) to get the best of me. I wore my feelings on my sleeve, I still do, and I was so incredibly sensitive. I played tough on the outside, but inside I was a big softie. I still am sometimes, but I think motherhood has definitely toughened me up.
Anytime I got into an argument with a friend, it felt like my whole life was ruined. It didn't matter who was in the wrong--I would completely shut down until our dilemma was solved.
Breakups? They were the most torturous.
Drama with my parents? ("Y'all are seriously not going to let me go to that party where everyone will be drinking and smoking God-know-what?") I would pout about it for days at a time.
None of that really prepares you for overwhelming disappointments in life, whether it's at your job or in a relationship. I wish it did... But sometimes things happens that you just have to get through. Things happen without warning, and we're left to decide how we'll handle it. The ball is in our court.
Recently I was faced with a really tough decision. Well, it wasn't so much that it was a decision to be made on my part, but I had to choose how I would react to a situation that was outside of my control.
I was hurt and disappointed, and quite honestly, I was mad. It took a day or two to get myself together and let go of the anger I was hanging onto. I had every right to be upset, but at the same time, I recognized that God was at work in my life; I knew this was a situation I could run from or learn from.
Taking the initiative to step back and try to make a tough experience a learning experience can be difficult. It often means you have to look at your situation from a different set of eyes; it's not always pleasant, but you usually learn a thing or two, or you at least get a little bit of empathy from a different point of view.
I thought I'd been through so much at 25, but the truth is that I'm nowhere near finished. There will be so many more times when I'm hurt or disappointed, and it will be up to me to decide how I handle the situation. I can hole up in my room and cry and feel sorry for myself, or I can accept it. I can take the tough times for exactly what they are (and they're all small things in the end) and I can learn from them.
No comments:
Post a Comment